Just another New Year’s Resolution

So it’s that time of the year again. Where we stop making sense and start making resolutions. Actually the time has come and gone but well, it’s never really late to straighten up your life. Many would say the realization in itself is half of the issue solved— the realization that there is something essentially wrong with your life. That realization is always there at the back of our minds. The sort where every minute of your life reminds you of the fact that the road you’ve taken is the not the one you’d intended to. And quite ironically, that happens mostly when you’ve covered half of the distance. Or you think you’ve covered it; or you have covered the distance that the world thinks you ought to cover. There are endless elucidations, but the bottom line always comes down to the single element that you KNOW that there is something incorrect which needs to be adjusted in order for you to be satisfied with your life. Satisfaction with life is quite a relative notion, like anything and everything else in life. Most people I’ve come across have never comprehended my yearning for something more than I already possess. They would directly or indirectly take it into the realm of ungratefulness— Because there is this inherent problem with most people in general to associate desire for perfection with ungratefulness. Perfection cannot be achieved, it cannot even be explained. And then everyone’s perfection is different. Perfection is relative, satisfaction is relative, and similarly ingratitude is relative. I am grateful for everything that I have, but that does not and should not stop me from wanting what I know I can achieve. Wanting to achieve my potential, whatever that may be, does not automatically make me ungrateful for what I have. These two things, in my opinion should not be interlinked. Even if I do not know what I want to have more than I already have, the very fact that I KNOW that I can achieve more and that I have not yet achieved my potential, would make me want more than I have. Which as a result will make me a little discontented with life. But at the same time, I would not stop acknowledging what I do possess. And I would certainly not become ‘ungrateful’ for it. It’s almost comical how everyone else except you KNOW that you are an ungrateful person, just because you have expressed the desire to achieve more that you already have. Anyway, I can go on and on with this drivel.

My purpose of writing this post today is that I have a new year’s resolution this year to share. Yes, you read it right. Actually I have a confession to make. I have been snubbing my real life of late. I have been wasting shit loads of time on these Social networking sites, which have suddenly emerged all over the Internet. My excuse is to tell myself that this is the 21st century and this is not a luxury anymore and has long become a necessity. Another one of my favorite excuses is that one needs to stay abreast with all the latest developments, lest the kids take you for a ride when they grow up. All a bunch of blatant lies I like to indulge myself in. So I am taking a plunge— I’m shutting down my Twitter account for starters today. At least for now. I really can’t say if it’s for good or that i’d be back after a little while (like i always do). But I seriously am having issues with myself, there are questions I need to answer, and for me to tackle all that, I need a break from this circus called social networking. For the moment. I need to get back to my real life. Too much time has been wasted trying to fit in, I just can’t afford to squander any more of my time doing what is being done just because it is something that is supposed to be done in this day and age. Hats off to people who can manage everything perfectly both online AND offline and still stay sane. But for me, it just doesn’t work anymore. So there.

And now that it is out of my system, I must hit the sack, since the winter vacation has almost ended, there’s lots of work to be done over the weekend, it’s bloody cold these days and kids’ schools are due to open on Monday. I am also aiming to update this almost dead blog of mine more often this year— another one of those resolutions that seldom work, but hey, one can hope. One can always hope. Since hope is presumably the thing that makes this world go round. I reckon.

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